vocation

What is this unshakable sense of purpose—an unknown, yet compelling path I must walk, something that goes beyond a day job, beyond earning money? 

He says, “It’s okay to have a vocation.”

I say, “I don’t think we’re using the same definition. When I say vocation I mean calling. When you say vocation you mean occupation.”

He says, “That’s right. Now you mean what I mean.”

I snap, “No, I do not.”

My path is not something he ever imagined intersecting with his path, let alone running parallel. I know what my vocation has been. But what should it be from this point forward? We are both mystified and frustrated by the questions. Meantime, we both keep walking and wondering, praying and pondering. We keep talking.

And I sing and write. My blogs haven’t prove that lately, but I have been singing and writing. These tasks are at the heart of my calling.

I am a poetess

And one day I will take my place

Among the grandmothers and wise women

I am a poetess

Between the silences

I hear stories and find the words to speak.

Listen to “Poetess” here.

 

Last week I sang this song in Thursday’s main session at Write! Canada. The next morning (Friday) I led my colleagues in worship. The previous evening (Wednesday, left) I sang “Child of My Heart” at the Canadian Christian Writing Awards. And our MC, Herbie Kuhn (announcer for the Toronto Raptors), could hardly speak afterwards, said he had expected to feel a lot of emotions that evening, but had not expected to be moved to tears. As an adoptive father, he felt like he could have written many of those words. He nearly broke down weeping, had a hard time regaining control. A surprise. An honour. 

With dreams for this song—possibly God-given dreams—I spoke freely all week about my ideas to develop a resource package for crisis pregnancy centres to use in fundraising and education. Now it’s time for market research.

Two of the song’s biggest fans were in the audience: Kathleen and Hannah Busch. They are the original inspiration for the song’s title.Kathleen took Hannah into her home two years ago and was finally able to adopt her a few months ago. They played “Child of My Heart” at a special adoption blessing service in October. Hannah has the CD and often falls asleep listening to it. She knows all the words. They live in BC, but just happened to be traveling in Ontario last week. Co-incidence. Seems like a God-incidence to me.

I am a poetess—singer-songwriter, storyteller, writer, editor, someone who takes care of stories. I have come home from Write! Canada with a collection of stories gleaned from conversations. Let me begin to tell …